About thehappyitch

mom, wife, quality control


This is my response to the “10 rules for dating my daughter” t-shirt wearing dads.  You may have seen this before:

Or this.

First question, where are all the shirts that say, “Moms against sons dating.”  Or, “You hurt my son while he’s dating your daughter; I cut you. Signed, his mom.” ?

Second question, does anyone else sense a hint of old- fashioned, paternalistic,  “Must protect my daughter’s hymen at all costs”?

Third question, raise your hand if you think ONLY teenage boys are capable of being horn-dogs, hurting someone else’s feelings, or getting violent?  Anyone?

Newsflash dads!  Your daughter is probably just as horny as the guy she is going out with.   Don’t believe me, ask her mother how horny SHE was as a teenager.   Do you think your princess is incapable of having sexual urges, or GASP, having sexual conquests of her own?


I’m not just writing this because I have a son (who is not allowed to date til he is 20 thankyouverymuch) I also have a daughter.  I have one rule and one rule only.  One rule to bind all other rules.

Don’t be a dick!


Sticks and stones

About a week ago, an almost seven year old quote was dug up from the archives at Salon.com.  The CEO of  Abercrombie and Fitch, Mike Jeffries, reveled his ‘clever’ marketing strategy:

 “In every school there are the cool and popular kids, and then there are the not-so-cool kids,” he says. “Candidly, we go after the cool kids. We go after the attractive all-American kid with a great attitude and a lot of friends. A lot of people don’t belong [in our clothes], and they can’t belong. Are we exclusionary? Absolutely. Those companies that are in trouble are trying to target everybody: young, old, fat, skinny. But then you become totally vanilla. You don’t alienate anybody, but you don’t excite anybody, either.”

Needless to say, it got attention…again, if not seven years ago.   Read full article here

Ok, one more…

This article made me laugh, especially this part:

“He doesn’t want his core customers to see people who aren’t as hot as them wearing his clothing,”


Hotness is a matter of opinion..

Men can shave too!

As a formally “un-cool” teenager (at least that’s how I saw myself), I really don’t give a crap what direction this guy wants to take his company or who he is marketing his clothing to.  I generally agree with this lady. I don’t agree that he hates overweight or un-hot people, that would be people putting words into his mouth.  I also don’t agree with pointing to companies who give lip-service to “real beauty” :

With each brand that joins arms with companies like DoveTOMS and Anytime Fitness, opting to lead with their values in order to drive new, important conversations, a positive change is happening. Who do you think will thrive? I’m willing to bet at least two out of three Americans can answer that question…and they’ll do so with their dollars.

I don’t know about TOMS or Anytime Fitness, but even Dove has not been above criticism.  Beauty and “cool standards” are really in eye of the beholder.  I remember meeting with an old friend from High School, one whom I had labeled as cool.  When I asked her if she had gone to our 10 year reunion, “No, I didn’t really have a reason to go back.”

I have had other realizations that the people I thought were cool, maybe didn’t see themselves that way.

It’s also been humorous and maybe even a little bit sad how we all rush to point out the setbacks in Mr. Jeffries own appearance.  I’ll have to admit that he does have some big brass balls to say he doesn’t want his core customers seeing un-hot people wearing his clothes.

Who is he to talk about attractiveness?

Looking at it from another perspective though, all the comments slamming him (as much as some of them made me cry laughing) seem to be stooping to his level.

Anywho, all this reminded me of a movie quote:

 We have news for the beautiful people. There’s a lot more of us than there are of you.

The Viagra Phallacy- memes surrounding the Reproductive Rights debate

1.  Viagra!

Check out this article.  Did you see the date?  June 19,2002!!  People have been asking “Why is one covered and the other not?” for years!  It IS fair to ask this question.  It is NOT fair to piss and moan about Viagra being covered with a co-pay when you can’t get FREE Birth Control!

Beginning Aug. 1, every American woman with an employer-provided health-insurance plan will be entitled to co-pay-free birth control. Religious employers who object to contraception will be given a one-year grace period, after which they, too, will be required to offer workers insurance plans that include birth-control coverage. The new compromise is that religious employers themselves will have no responsibility to either pay for this coverage or to communicate with employees about it; instead, those burdens will shift to insurance companies, at no additional cost to consumers.

Stop comparing Apples to Oranges!

True story: if you’re taking the Morning After pill!

2.  The Hypocrisy (and inhumanity)

Attaching Sandra Fluke to this IS just misinformation.  She’s not asking the government to pay for shit!  She testified because the Catholic University she attends, does not include contraception coverage on their heath care plan.  (Duh, they’re Catholic)  There are PLENTY of ways to disagree with her without spreading misinformation.


3. The “Just don’t have sex!” argument.

Okay, you want to go there?  How about, “Just don’t eat fast food everyday so you can keep your cholesterol under control so you don’t need those cholesterol medications covered under your insurance.”   How about blood pressure or diabetes medication?   These should not be covered under insurance either because people should just eat right and exercise.  Sex is healthy and burns calories, a Big Mac doesn’t!

Just for kicks, read this article….

This entire debate is framed WRONG!  The real question is: Does the Government have the right and authority to tell an insurance company they have to cover any type of medicine free of charge?    My answer would be……no.

Random thoughts about Reward cards and breast pumps

Nowadays you can get rewards for everything: gasoline, groceries, coffee, books, pet supplies, etc.  When my oldest child was an infant we even had a Babies R Us reward card.   The people at Babies/Toys R Us have come with a new Reward card.   It’s called the V.I.B. Card 

Here’s a short description:

What is the Very Important Baby (V.I.B.) card?
The Very Important Baby (V.I.B.) card is a reloadable gift card that you can use to purchase all of baby’s important essentials – diapers, wipes, formula, and baby food! When funds are loaded onto the V.I.B. card by friends and family (or Mom, herself), ”R”Us will add a 10% bonus within 24 to 48 hours. For example, if $100 is loaded onto your V.I.B. card, ”R”Us will add $10 bonus dollars. You can earn up to $200 bonus dollars per year.


I think it sounds pretty neat……except it seems they are leaving out one demographic.  Breastfeeding moms!

You might say, “What does a breastfeeding mom care?  Duh, they’re not using formula!”  No, but they might want to purchase a breast-pump.

I realize many breastfeeding mom wont even use a pump.  But for the mom who is going back to work, a breast-pump and milk storage bags are a MUST.

At Toys R Us a Medela Freestyle breast-pump is $400.00   Breastfeeding storage bags are around $10.00 a box.  That adds up and even if mom is working, it’s still an expense.
It’s not even just working moms who would purchase breast-pump supplies.  Many breastfeeding moms like to have even a manual pump on hand just in case they need to relieve engorgement so their baby can get a better latch.  Some moms pump extra milk for donations to milk banks or directly to other moms who want their babies to have breast milk but can’t produce enough on their own.

In any case, it seems that the “R US” people are ignoring the potential for more customers.  Why not add breastfeeding supplies to your rewards list?  It couldn’t hurt!

Leaving critical facts out

Birth Control is really popular lately.  Check out these article titles:

Absence of women at birth-control hearing prompts larger question

Congressional Birth Control Hearing Involves Exactly Zero People Who Have a Uterus

‘Where are the women?’ Outrage after birth control hearing is led by panel of five MEN


Birth Control Hearing Not Really About Birth Control, Says GOP

House Democrats Walk Out Of One-Sided Hearing On Contraception, Calling It An ‘Autocratic Regime’

With the articles came these responses:

Yesterday I finally took the time to see what the deal was.  Thursday, Congress began a hearing titled-  “Lines Crossed: Separation of Church and State. Has the Obama Administration Trampled on Freedom of Religion and Freedom of Conscience?”

Now I’m not dense, I realize that “Birth Control” is being discussed in part during this hearing.  But from the titles of the articles you would think that the legality of birth control is being discussed not an employer’s “Freedom of Religion/Conscience” being violated if he has to pay for his female employees’ birth control.

I’m not posting this to debate on “Freedom of Religion” or the “accessibility” of birth control.   I’m posting it because the media selects the facts they want you to know and leaves out critical information. The public eats it up without bothering  to look at all the facts.  Sensationalism sells people!

The “Birth Control hearing” is really a hearing regarding religion, to which only two women were invited.  (Source CNN)

                     Two other women invited by the Republicans, Dr. Laura Champion and Allison Dabbs Garrett, later testified during a second panel.

Think about that for two seconds…..

My first try making Baked Pork and Beans.

My family is on a tight budget.  When food like Ham goes on sale we get excited because ham makes a nice dinner but I can get two other meals out of the leftovers.   When the man went grocery shopping and brought home a ham, I was feeling like Oh no, not THAT again!  Ham dinner?  Yummy!  Bean soup afterwards?  Getting. OLD!!!

Man of the house:  Why don’t you try making Pork and Beans?


Hmmm I’ll give it a try.

So, this morning I did what I always do,

I scoured the internets for some a Baked Beans recipe.  I came across one and should give a shout out to The Pioneer Woman.   No this isn’t the recipe I settled on but did use a couple of the steps for making my sauce.

Since I had my beans simmering on the stove with the ham bone all I really needed was a recipe for BBQ sauce.  I settled on this one.

I use recipes more like a guide, for example, I HATE with seething hatredness, how all the BBQ sauce recipes that I come across are ketchup based.

Needless to say, I switched things up a bit so this is what I came up with.

Oven temp.  350F

1 lb dry beans (of course you are going to cook these ahead of time but I started with a pound of dry great northern beans.)

8 slices of BACON cut in half

1 5.2 oz can Tomato Paste

3/4 cup liquid, I used apple, passion, mango juice .  I’m sure stock, water or the cooking liquid from your beans would work too.

1/3 cup Apple Cider Vinegar

1/3 cup brown sugar

2 TBSP yellow mustard (I bet Dijon would be really good too.)

1 half onion diced

1 diced celery stalk plus the leafy greens

1 TBSP garlic powder

1/2 tsp Tabasco Sauce


Directions (yeah, like who needs them?)

In large skillet (I used my Pampered Chef 12 inch family skillet), render the fat out of the bacon.  Next remove the bacon from pan and set aside on paper towels.  Add onions and celery to the skillet and let them get cozy with the bacon drippings. After the onions and celery are soft add entire can of tomato paste, followed by the ACV and your choice of liquid.  Here it would be a good idea to have an extra cup or so of water to thin the sauce a little; tomato paste tends to thicken really fast.  Add the rest of the ingredients and let the sauce simmer on the stove for about 10 minutes.

After 10 minutes add your beans and mix well.  I can place my skillet pan in the oven but if you want you can transfer the mixture to a casserole dish.   Turn off the heat and top with bacon slices.

Bake for 45 minutes or until bacon is nice and browned.

Smile when significant other comes home and says “It smells really awesome in here!”

It’s too bad I didn’t take a picture.

I will be making it again though!






What does this mean for me?




“These are not rants against the system. They’re not anarchist manifestos. They’re not calls for a revolution. They’re small stories of people who played by the rules, did what they were told, and now have nothing to show for it.” Sounds familiar.


People who are trying to do what they are supposed to do.




I’m 32 years old.

At 16, I got my first job working as a Dietary Aide in a Nursing Home.

At 18 I graduated high school and went straight to college like “a good little young person.”

I worked all through college first in the college’s TV station, back at the nursing home as a housekeeper and, during my last year, as a receptionist in a mammography center.   I didn’t have all these jobs at once and I did play once in a while, you know, drinking, smoking, and clubbing. I didn’t take out any loans and put my tuition/ books on my credit card and made payments on that.  Living with my parents helped, thanks Mom and Dad!

At 22 I graduated from Community College with a degree in Radiology. I picked Radiology as a major primarily because of the money but also, at the time, Healthcare was a rapidly growing field.  In June of that year I got a job at an Occupational Health center.  In July of that year I got my own place.   In November of that year, I met my husband.   (2001 was a big year for me)

At 24 My husband and I bought our house. I stayed at the Occupational Health center until 2003 then took a chance on a position working as a Cardiovascular tech.  That lasted for 3 months.  Then I was on unemployment for a month until I found work through a temp service. In the Spring of 2004 I found a job in another Occupational Health office.

Spring of 2005- Had a kid.  Husband went to school to A+ certified.

2006- dealt with postpartum blues, became increasingly unhappy with my job but, like a “good little taxpayer” waited until I found a different one before I quit.   That new job lasted all of three months because I “wasn’t the right fit.”

2007-2008 on unemployment and took the scant temp service work offered.  When I say ‘scant’, I mean it, no one wants an x-ray tech now.   Husband worked 70 hours a week, most weeks.

2008 had another kid.  (Don’t worry, that wont be happening again)

2009- Not much on the temp service front, in fact I think I worked a whole two days that summer.

2010- Grudgingly dragged my ass to the WIC office.  We qualified because husband’s overtime at work went away.  I got ‘lucky’ and found a minimum wage job in retail with part-time hours mostly 3 hours an evening; two or three nights a week.

Now I just found a second part-time job to carry us through the Holidays.  It will help us pay one more bill, I’m going to keep my mall job because I like it.

My husband has Type 2 Diabetes and our health insurance just went up.  We refinanced the house last year.  We have two beautiful, smart children and I hope they use their brains better than their parents did.

Am I the 53% or the 99%?

If I am the 53% I promise not to shove it in your face.  If I am the 99% and you call me lazy, I will kick you in the nuts.